What Child is This?
by ScorplinginTraining
Summary: It's been eight months since the team split. Life goes on. Until Walter gets the ultimate Christmas surprise.
1. Chapter 1

**WHAT CHILD IS THIS?**

 **AN: Here's an early Christmas present for those of you who celebrate or for anyone else who is dying for a heart-warming Scorpion Christmas episode like we had in Seasons 1 and 2.**

 **Question: Should this stand alone as a one-shot? Or does it need more? Review with your thoughts, please.**

 **oxoxoxoxoxo**

His eyes felt like gravel pits in his skull.

Rubbing at them with the heels of his hands to alleviate the gritty feeling, Walter acknowledged he desperately needed sleep. Not to mention a shower. And clean clothes. And a shave. But his stomach chose that moment to loudly remind him food was actually the most urgent need.

He wasn't down the rabbit hole. He couldn't afford to be. There was no one around who cared enough to pull him out again. He simply had to work harder these days. Not only did Scorpion need to recoup the year's losses, what with Cabe's bail money and trial expenses plus the unsuccessful infertility treatments of To… the former team shrink's and his engineer wife's, but he'd also discovered if he stayed completely absorbed in work, he could forget everything else for awhile.

Well, almost.

Stomach rumbling incessantly, Walter stood and stretched the kinks out of his stiff back and legs. Even though Pai… the former office manager had replaced the desk chairs with ergonomic alternatives years ago, they obviously weren't made for a person to sit in them for twelve hour working marathons.

Had he really worked all night? Again?

Yep. It was 7:30 on Saturday morning. He shook his head. Pathetic.

Not bothering to stifle an enormous, jaw-cracking yawn and kneading his hollow stomach, the genius shuffled around desks to get to the kitchen area. He yanked open the ancient, faded harvest gold refrigerator. Or tried to. The handle came off in his hand, making him take a stumbling step backward.

Damn it.

Hap… The former Scorpion mechanic had babied the appliance and kept it in good working order. Without doubt, the new engineer was brilliant, but he reserved that brilliance solely for paying jobs.

Sighing, Walter tossed the faulty handle on top of the refrigerator before prying the door open with his fingers.

He wrinkled his nose. It was nearly empty and what remained smelled sour and moldy. The new manager was very efficient with invoices and payroll, but she'd informed him early on that cleaning and grocery shopping 'wasn't in her job description'.

He supposed those duties fell to him now. Better to get it over with. He could catch up on sleep later.

While tossing out the spoiled food, he found a half-empty box of stale teddy bear-shaped graham crackers way in the back. Ral… his old office manager's son must have left them there. Ignoring the sharp pang in his chest, he hastily ate a handful while jotting down a list of needed items.

If Syl... the prior statistician was still there, this task wouldn't be necessary either. It would already be enumerated and alphabetized, stuck on the refrigerator at a perfect ninety degree angle under a Super Fun Guy magnet. The new numbers guy didn't have OCD or anxiety issues, so he stuck to statistics and calculations needed for missions.

Walter despised grocery shopping. Not only was it a mind-numbingly dull, mundane task, the stores were usually packed with humans; old folks poking the produce, health nuts reading the fine print on labels, children whining for treats, all of them always congregating in the aisles making it impossible to get to the products on his own list.

And the worst possible day of the week for those exact circumstances? Saturday.

Until he arrived at the store, he'd also forgotten it was December. The whole experience was suddenly made even worse because it was the holiday season. Everyone else was baking and feasting, making shopping for food even more essential for them. Thus making the store even more annoyingly crowded for Walter.

It was no surprise he'd forgotten, really. There were no Christmas decorations adorning the garage this year. Aside from the challenging nature of some of Scorpion's cases, one day pretty much blended into the next and he didn't really notice the changing seasons any more.

Gritting his teeth, he dodged his cart around a trampled package of hamburger buns and two irritating, chatting shoppers on his way to grab coffee filters.

And there she was. Paige.

Walter froze. This was another reason he avoided shopping. Probably the primary reason, if he was being honest. He had no desire to run into her. Or maybe he did and that was the problem.

His eyes drank in the sight of her as his stomach gave a painful lurch. He couldn't see her fully because her profile was toward him as she stood on tiptoes searching the back of a tall shelf. However, he could tell her hair was shorter and darker, swinging just above her shoulders and brushing her jaw line. Her face seemed a little bit rounder, but he couldn't tell if she'd gained weight in general because her tan trench coat hung open around her sides.

Before he could stop staring long enough to retreat, the box of filters dropped from his nerveless fingers hitting the ground and splitting, scattering the contents with all the subtlety of fireworks display.

Of course, she turned her head instantly. Their gazes locked. He felt a jolt go through him and watched her eyes widen with shock and dismay. Well, what did he expect?

Walter quickly stooped to pick up the mess, haphazardly stuffing filters back in the ruined box, fully expecting her to be gone once he'd stood back up. Until the familiar toes of her favorite boots came into his peripheral vision, that is. One slim hand passed him a stack of filters and he took it, being careful not to touch those slender fingers. He mumbled a semi-coherent 'thanks'.

They both stood up simultaneously. And the box tumbled from his hand again even as his jaw dropped.

Paige was pregnant! Very pregnant! Her globular abdomen protruded as if she was shoplifting a basketball. He quickly did the math in his head.

She smiled wryly and said, "Merry Christmas, Walter."


	2. Chapter 2

**WHAT CHILD IS THIS?**

 **AN: I probably went a different way with this than most of you expected. I hope you like it anyway. A million thanks to those who reviewed. This chapter is for you.**

 **Without further ado:**

 **oxoxoxoxoxo**

"Walter?! Toby! Get over here!"

Paige's frantic voice sounded miles away.

He must have fainted and cracked his head on the hard tile. Oh, great. In the middle of the grocery store, no less. Perfect. The shock of seeing the evidence of Paige's pregnancy must have been too much for his already over-tired brain.

Walter attempted to drag his eyelids open, but it was a herculean task as if they'd been infused with lead. He grimaced with the effort.

Her hand was in his, but he didn't notice until she tried to withdraw it. His fingers tightened reflexively and he mumbled something that sounded vaguely like her name. His throat was so dry and his head felt thick, like it was stuffed with cotton.

"Toby! Come quick! He squeezed my hand and he tried to say something!"

Wait. Why was Paige calling for Toby? Was he at the store too?

"Use the call button, dummy!" Happy's voice barked from somewhere on the right side of him.

Was _everyone_ shopping today? He pictured Sylvester pushing the Team Centipede cart while obsessively cleaning the handle with sanitizing wipes.

Suddenly the back of his head was throbbing as if The Little Drummer Boy was pounding out the proverbial meager offering on the inside of Walter's skull.

"Mr. O'Brien, can you hear me? Can you open your eyes?"

Who the hell was that? And what did she think he'd been mightily striving to do for the last few minutes? He tried to ask the woman if she'd been imbibing too much eggnog, but the question came out all garbled.

"Do you think the injury damaged the speech center of his brain?" Florence asked in her typical, blunt fashion.

Was the store giving special discounts for geniuses today? Was it Geek Week at the Pick and Save or something?

Walter's eyes snapped open and he squinted into Paige's beautiful, concerned face, doing his best to bring her into focus. He'd missed her so much.

"Hey. There you are, baby. You came back to me," she whispered almost in reverence, her eyes bright with unshed tears.

Hang on. Baby?

Baby! Walter scrambled to sit up, wanting to confirm his recent discovery of Paige's pregnancy. Seeing her flat stomach, he blurted, "Did you have the baby already?" He must've been out quite a bit longer than he thought!

As an unknown woman in scrubs pressed Walter's shoulders back to the mattress making hushing noises, he spied Sylvester lurking at the end of the bed, twisting a tissue between agitated hands. "Oh, no! He's not making sense. That's not a good sign, is it?"

While the nurse fiddled with the leads attached to his body and shined a light in his eyes, he struggled to take a good look around. Plainly he was no longer in the grocery store. He was in a hospital room, the stark environment was interrupted by a miniature Christmas tree's multi-colored LED lights blinking in one corner and tinny carols emanating from someone's phone on the counter. And he was surrounded by the people he cared for most in the whole world; the very same people who hadn't spoken to him in eight of the longest months of his life.

This annoying nurse needed to leave him alone. He had things to say. He shoved at her hands until she calmly informed him she would have to restrain him if he kept fighting her ministrations.

"Do you know your name?" She inquired in an ultra-patient manner usually reserved for the extremely slow-witted.

Well, duh. He scowled, offended. "Yes."

Toby chuckled. "Take it easy, Big Brain. Leave the poor lady alone. She's only doing her job. If you cooperate, she'll be done soon."

Walter rolled his eyes. It hurt his head. "I did cooperate," he insisted, "I answered the question she asked me."

Happy thumped his arm. "She wants you to say it, idiot."

Paige was shaking her head looking a little frustrated by his stubbornness, so he grudgingly complied, mimicking the nurse's patronizing tone, "Wal-ter Pa-trick O'-Bri-en." Then he quietly grumbled to himself, "If she wanted me to say my name, she should've been more specific in the first place."

The nurse's compassionate demeanor slipped a little, her lips thinning. "Thank you. Now, do you know where you are…? Let me be clearer," she stopped herself with a smirk, "Please, tell me where you are."

"I'm in a hospital. Can I talk to my friends now?" Walter answered tartly as the nurse prodded at his bandages, making him wince.

"He's come back from more concussions than Troy Aikman," Cabe stated, sounding somewhat impressed.

"Yeah. He'll probably develop Parkinson's before long." Sylvester shook his head, a worried frown on his face. "Maybe even Epilepsy."

"Way to find the silver lining, Nervous Nelly," Toby threw in, "Look on the bright side, maybe I don't have the lowest IQ on the team anymore."

Paige brushed the hair off of Walter's uninjured forehead, smiling gently. "He's still with us. That's what matters." She kissed him tenderly where her fingers had just been.

Walter couldn't contain it another second. "What's going on here? Why is everyone talking to me like nothing ever happened?"

His eyes landed on Sylvester first. "I didn't mean it, Sly. I admire your innocent enjoyment of childhood occupations. Don't let anyone's opinion steal that from you. I might not understand because I didn't like those things even when I _was_ a child, but I never thought it made you immature. Never. I only said it because I was... Listen, you made my sister _so_ happy. You made her last days the best of her life. She would _never_ be ashamed of you for any reason. I never should have said that… Any woman would be lucky to have you. I also never intended to steal Florence's affection away from you. I had no idea…you... and her... And-and besides, you're my _brother_. I've always said you were the bravest one of all of us. Always standing up for your beliefs in spite of your fears. Look at what all you've accomplished… You're an alderman and a lawyer! I'm so proud of you. Let me tell you, Scorpion isn't the same without you."

The younger man's jaw dropped, but before he could take a breath to reply, Walter looked over at Toby and rushed to continue, "And you. I-I value your expertise. I do. Your skills have saved us all on more than one occasion. And I _do_ listen to you. More than you think. I might be too proud or too… scared to take your advice as quickly as I should. Or I struggle with admitting when I'm wrong, but… I wasn't able to replace you at all. Do you know how hard it is to find a genius behaviorist who is also a physician who can improvise in emergency situations? So far, it's proved impossible. Scorpion has suffered greatly in your absence. Plus, I've spent some of the best times of my life with you and even if it's not official, you're my brother too. And-and I even miss arguing with you…"

Walter didn't bother with processing the extremely puzzled look on the shrink's face. He turned to Happy and hurried on, "Yes. I found another engineer. He's probably even a genius. He's certainly a self-proclaimed genius. But he has no _heart_. I didn't understand just how important that quality is. But you? You love your tools and machines so much that your work is instinctive. Not to mention, you're my… my best friend. I can't replace that with a hundred mechanics. I could disappear down the rabbit hole and he wouldn't notice. I could be deported and he'd walk away without a backward glance. I know it makes you uncomfortable to talk to me about personal issues, but you've always been straight with me when I needed it. I'm sorry I ignored you."

"What the hell are you…," Happy started.

But Walter interrupted, looking at Florence, "I don't love you. I'm not attracted to you like that. I admire your chemistry expertise. I enjoy discussing certain topics with someone, it could be anyone for that matter, with like interests, but that's as far as it goes. While I appreciate you sticking by me, you and I will never attend another event alone outside of work. It's Paige and only Paige for me. Even though she no longer wants to be with me. I'm sorry if that disappoints you. You would've been far better off with Sly."

"What?! Who said I was…" Florence turned red and appeared angry, but it couldn't be helped. She dropped a tin of peppermint bark on his bedside table. The noise echoed painfully inside his tortured head. But Walter needed to get all this out while everyone was still there. He simply had to take advantage of this rare opportunity.

"Are you okay?" Ralph asked. The boy had been lingering quietly by the bedside with an anxious expression on his young face.

Walter took the teen's hand and smiled reassuringly. "Better than I've been in months now that you're all here with me again. I've missed _you_ most of all. I know we never discussed it, but I felt an instant connection with you. Right from the very first time we met. You made me want to be more human and you were always like a son to me. It just took us nine years to find each other. Being without you has been like… missing an important and essential component. I don't function normally without you around."

"But Walter, we just saw each other…"

Walter talked over him, finally addressing Paige, "I'm so-sorry. I don't even know where to start with you. I know I let you down. I know I dismissed your preferences and your contributions. But you were always great. You made Scorpion… and-and me better. I know I was an unsatisfactory boyfriend in every way. I know we're very different people, but I was never happier or more whole than when I was with you. I wish you'd never tried to teach me the concept of the 'white lie' because I think open communication and honesty are a much better option when people love each other. But I'm not using that as an excuse. I know I ruined things. You are smart and beautiful and kind. You deserve to be happy. I'm sorry I f-failed you," he swallowed hard, "I only hope you'll let me be a part of the baby's life."

Tears prickled in his eyes as he glanced around the circle of stunned faces. At least he'd gotten it all out. All those things he'd been dying to say for months.

"Son…" Cabe was the first to speak, but the doctor breezed in the room before he could say anything.

"So, you decided to join us for Christmas, did you?" She smiled benignly and let down the bedrail. Perching on the side of the bed, she checked his pupils and peeked under the bandages, humming assessing noises. "Can you tell me what year it is?"

The genius sighed. "2018," he replied impatiently, choosing not to point out the logic error in the question this time.

The doctor paused. She frowned, held up an index finger and said, "Here. Follow my finger with your eyes."

Talking as if he wasn't present, the doctor asked the group, "Has he been exhibiting confusion like this since he woke up?"

Everyone spoke at once. "He's talking crazy." "He's acting like he hasn't seen us in months." "He thinks I'm expecting a child!" "He's being a jerk. But that's pretty normal."

Irritated with the dismissal, Walter answered for them, "I'm _fine_. What's the problem?"

"Sir, it's actually 2017."

"What?" Walter's mouth dropped open in shock. The doctor stood and eyed him thoughtfully.

"You were being stubborn, as usual, and insisted on working through Christmas. You fell down the stairs at the garage, 197." Toby was talking to him slowly, like he was nuts. Coming from a genius behaviorist, that attitude was more than a little scary. "You've only been out for a little over twenty-four hours."

"No! I woke up from that time. I dreamed everyone was better off without me. I told you about that, remember? Then Paige got upset because I was married to Florence in my dream and even though I wasn't happy about it I guess I didn't reassure her enough and then I ruined everything because I took Florence to a lecture Paige said she'd rather be in a swamp with alligators than attend with me and I didn't tell Paige and you all told me to tell her the truth but I was scared of hurting her and losing her and I ended up hurting her and losing her anyway and Sylvester got mad because he said I stole Florence away from him but I never knew he had feelings for her and I _never_ thought about her that way and I said some more stupid stuff and Sly shoved me and Cabe broke us apart so Sly walked out then Paige left too and I called Toby and Happy know-it-alls and they quit too and I was alone in the garage and you all went and made your own team called Team Centipede and started taking all of Scorpion's clients and you all hated me…I've been miserable about all of it ever since," Walter gasped for breath looking around wildly.

A loaded silence fell. Happy snickered into her hand. Then the room exploded with laughter.

"I'm glad you find my misery so entertaining," He said sourly.

Toby was the first to recover. "Oh, lighten up, boss. You have to admit it's pretty funny. I quit because you didn't listen to my advice and you called me a know-it-all? You've only done that, like, a hundred times a day since we met. Isn't my number listed under 'Know-It-All' in your contacts? Please…"

Happy wiped her streaming eyes. "And me? You think I would've quit on you? Because you did something dumb and didn't listen to me? It wouldn't be the first time. I think you need your head examined again. I mean, I might've called you a few rude names and knocked you around a little… or a lot. But come _on_. I _married_ your ass to keep it in the country, moron!"

"And I know you think my hobbies are childish," Sylvester shrugged and chimed in, "It's not like any of you try to hide your opinions from me. And you aren't the only one. Toby says it. Happy says it. Cabe says it. Even Ralph has made some comments. You guys always tease me about it. All. The. Time. I don't care. I like what I like. And guess what? Megan _loved_ that about me because she liked all that stuff too. Why would I walk out on you? You're Megan's brother. And mine. We're _family._ " Then the mathematician began to squirm uncomfortably, shifting his weight from foot to foot, his gaze darting everywhere except in Florence's direction. He said in a stage whisper, "And who says… I never said I had a… _thing_ for Flo…"

"It's Florence," the chemist immediately corrected, "And I never said I had a _thing_ for Walter either." Her lip was curled as if the thought disgusted her. "It's pretty arrogant for you to assume otherwise. I don't even know you that well. Maybe you're confused because I saved your life? But you shouldn't conclude that automatically means I… love you or anything. You and I would kill each other. You require much more patience than I have. Frankly, I think Paige is a saint. I'm sure you know that and I recognize you are happy to have her. So, why would I ever entertain the thought of you and I as a couple? Paige is my friend! And honestly, Sylvester _is_ more my type," She added matter-of-factly, crossing her arms.

Sly grinned ear-to-ear, looking astounded, and said, "Really?"

"Way to go, Sly," Toby piped up.

His wife gave him a no-look high-five. "Called it. Didn't we?"

"Think about it," Ralph said reasonably, "Team Centipede, was it? A centipede is a big evolutionary step down from a Scorpion. What a stupid name. Why would a group of geniuses ever call themselves _that_? Besides, you're the dad I've always wanted, you know. We've been the _best_ family since you and mom got together. Why would she throw all that away without even trying to work it out? And why would she ever keep me away from you? She knows what we mean to each other and she always does what's best for me even if it's not so easy for her." His eyes met his mom's and they shared a smile.

Paige grasped Walter's chin and turned his head towards her. "I waited three long years for you, mister. Sure, being with you is not without it's challenges. We've got more than our share of differences. Our relationship isn't perfect. But I've never seen one that is and I believe we are perfect for each other. I'm willing to fight for that. So… I'm not just going to cut and run over a stupid misunderstanding, and worse, try to destroy your life's work in the process. I would never do that. I _love_ you. No matter what, I'd want what's best for you. Now, tell me why in the world you thought I was pregnant…?"

"I saw you in the grocery store… after – after…" Walter pressed the heels of his hands to his aching forehead. "So I really fell…yesterday? I didn't miss Christmas with my family? I didn't ruin everything?"

"Not yet," Toby replied with a crooked grin, "Wow. That musta been one hellava vivid dream you had there, bud. Apparently you lived an entire year between your ears in just twenty-four hours. From the sounds of it, it wasn't one of your best years either."

Pulling Paige and Ralph into his embrace, Walter beamed. "I've got another chance, then. It's not too late. I can change and get my priorities straight. I can show the people I care about that I value them."

"Well said, Ebenezer." Cabe said, winking.

"Who?" Asked Walter.

"And God bless us, every one," Ralph quipped while the room rang with laughter again.


End file.
